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Some Rambling Thoughts on Living the 20-something life

The Outs TV

Puzzled looks on characters from the web series, The Outs—about 20-somethings living in Brooklyn

I’m feeling a bit funny today. Whether it’s because of the grey sky outside my window, my mind aflutter with ideas, or simply because I’ve been laying in bed for over an hour distracted by one too many emails, I don’t know. Ich weiß es nicht.

Yesterday was one of those days where your mind is racing and you’ve got a million little ideas floating around—none of them will stick, likely, but it’s nice to have them, to collect them. Thoughts of the future, my goals, my seemingly non-existant plans for a future. I don’t know about you, but these are things that pop up in my mind all the time. And while I’m always trying to physically do things to achieve them, more often than not I just circle back around—lost and as confused as ever. And that is what’s about to happen with this blog post.

* * *

Is there anything worse than an elder (and by that I mean, anyone a day older than me) looking down upon you and treating you like a fool? Simply because you’re younger and therefore must be more naive? We’re supposed to treat people with respect, but so often I find people who don’t treat the younger generations with any modicum of respect. Simply providing veiled wisdom wrapped up in a friendly, “I know what’s best for you” tone. And I’m not talking about grandfathers and grandmothers. Everyone wants to impart their wisdom on a different generation. From the 30-somethings looking down upon the 20-somethings, the yuppies upon the hippies. And so on and so forth. Of course, it’s not all bad. And some people want the advice. But it’s that tone. That “I know you more than you” tone that destroys.

So how do I fight it? I listen to my peers. Maybe some call it peer pressure. And maybe it’s a bubble, but hey… we can figure this out together, can’t we? Sure it can be dangerous if you hang out with dangerous people. But it can also be beneficial if you’re brainstorming life, thinking about the world, with those that share your passion. This comes up all the time when backpacking. I remember weeks of sitting on Indian beaches, meeting and talking with travelers from the world over. We may have been different ages—from those in college to 40-somethings—but we were all on an adventure. We were looking for answers. Asking questions and listening. Not willing to say “this is the way” but instead we were thinking.

Thinking is a thing I really love to do. Perhaps I spend too much time thinking and not enough time doing. And that’s something I plan to work on. But for now: we’re thinking.

TV shows like ‘Girls’ (I know, I know – I’m sorry for bringing up the series that everyone loves to talk about) seem to embrace this thinking mentality. It’s what attracted me to the show in the first place. It’s no surprise that it’s written by a 20-something because it pretty much captures the crazy thoughts and ideas going through my mind. I mean, it’s a TV show so some of it is exaggerated obviously, but the mood and atmosphere of the show certainly match the mood and atmosphere of my life. Or at least of the life I’m working on building today. It’s no surprise that there have been so many reviews and criticisms of the show as much as of the writer. Girls pretty much dares to speak for the 20-somethings today—something no one else is going to do for us. And it does it pretty well, too.

There’s another show I watched recently: The Outs. Again, it’s written by a 20-something in Brooklyn. It’s about—you guessed it: 20-somethings in Brooklyn. But this web series (available for free in its entirety online) is different. The show got its successful start through Kickstarter last year, and then hit the tipping point when it reached the gay media. I like it because its characters are ones I can identify with, but also because the characters seem as dysfunctional and confused as the actual people I know in my life—to a much more real degree than in Girls.

What keeps me enamored with these 20-something TV shows is that they’re not written by some stuffy person looking down upon my generation—but instead they’re from my generation. Listening to characters talk about not having enough money, about “blogging” (is that all we 20-somethings do these days?) or bitching and whining—this is my life. And I suspect it’s also a part of yours.

* * *

I realize I may not be on the side of the majority with this one, but I appreciate the inward-looking nature of my generation. I’m proud of the fact that I don’t know what I’m doing and that I’m trying to figure it out.

Maybe I’m just some punk kid (not a punk, fyi). One of these days I’ll finally figure out what I want out of life. And maybe then I’ll stop asking questions (don’t count on it). But for now, I just want people to stop telling me what to be or how to act. I am me. And I’m okay with that. I’ll figure something out.

Anyways…I’m rambling. You should just watch this web series. Because it “gets” me. And I get it. Plus each episode is full of sexy sexy Brooklyn hipsters.

The Outs: State of the Union from The Outs

  1. OCDemon says:

    I take issue with elderly “experts” wishing to impart wisdom as well. Anytime someone talks first instead of listening is probably going to issue a useless instruction. Plus, culture is changing so fast that most parents just don’t keep up with it.

    I think this is most difficult for the younger generation when parents and grandparents start any sentence with “when I was your age…” because in reality, what that means is “back when health care was cheap, gas was cheap, housing was cheap, food was cheap, higher education was cheap, and no jobs had been shipped off to China…” Well, it might as well be a synonym for “I had it really easy, but I’m going to complain that you’re doing it wrong.” I don’t think they’ll ever really get it.

    • Adam says:

      Hey OCDemon,
      Thanks for the comment and adding to the conversation. You’re spot on about the “when I was your age” remark. This world of ours is changing fast and not always for the better.

  2. Dennis B. says:

    I have had these thoughts for quite a while myself even though I am on the other end of 20’s, I am 29. And I never felt more unsure, uneasy, than I have ever felt now, even compared to my teens. I think its just zeitgeist with the economy in Europe and North America not doing so well, environmental degradation, no easy paths to a career (unpaid internships), relationships that rise and falter, and perhaps a realization that we won’t live as well as our parents.
    But there is a silver lining to everything, or that’s what an Optimist in me says. And that is a freedom that we allow ourselves, a freedom to travel (if we have the money) to experience other cultures, to bridge that gap of divisiveness that always seems to exist. We don’t know what the future holds but we can work on something concrete and present now, Something that can make us better and the world around us as well.

    P.S. English is not my native tongue.
    P.S.S. I really like your blog it is very inspiring to know that one can travel around the world with such limited budget and take reasonable risks to grow and challenge oneself.

    • Adam says:

      “And I never felt more unsure, uneasy, than I have ever felt now, even compared to my teens”

      Thank you Dennis for sharing your thoughts! I’m so glad to hear your optimistic thoughts as well. I think the winter has drawn out the worst emotions in me and reading so much about the future has only led me down dark thoughts – but I do believe you about there being a silver lining to the way the world is headed. With all of the problems we’ve got (even middle-class Americans like myself), there is still quite a bit of opportunity. And if there’s one thing our generation seems to have a lot of—it’s hope…and even happiness.

      Thanks for the kind comments.

  3. Rachel says:

    New web series! Hello gorgeous. OMG, I’ve only seen one episode and I already love The Outs more than Girls. Whoa, sorry to jump straight to that, but I’m sort of on a web show kick and I absolutely love this one.

    The thing that frustrates me about people talking down to me (I’m 21), is that I strongly believe that everyone needs to make their own mistakes. Even if they do “have all the answers” and who knows, maybe they do, if I take their word for it then I’m never going to understand why it needs to happen like that.

    • Adam says:

      Hey Rachel – so glad to hear you love The Outs as much as me! I was hooked from the very first episode as well.

      You’re absolutely right about people having to make their own mistakes. Otherwise it’s impossible to learn from them.

    • Adam says:

      Haha, I know… I saw it the other day and wasn’t so surprised to find so many gifs from Girls!

  4. Katrinka says:

    Adam! This is exactly the sort of thing I’ve been thinking recently. What the heck am I doing, living abroad without a plan? Shouldn’t I know what I want to be already? The 20-something malaise. Maybe this is the week for it. I’m glad to know I’m not the only one thinking about this stuff!

  5. Hey Adam, I’m a silent follower of your blog, but thought I’d drop you a comment to say thanks for recommending this show. I’ve spent a very hungover Sunday watching this series…from start to finish!

  6. I’ve been living in a cave. I don’t even know about these two TV shows right now. Will.Check.Them.Out

    Thanks Adam!

  7. Rohit says:

    I know exactly what you mean. I feel like Lena Dunham wrote my brain down in Girls. But hey, maybe Those Damn Thirties will fix things for us. I’m turning twenty-seven soon, so I’ll know soon anyway.

    Thanks for introducing me to The Outs. Saw the episode; seems fun!

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